


So he thought he was a hero -- Episode 1: Quest the Fighter

by ChipChallenge149



Category: Quest For Glory
Genre: Parody, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-02
Updated: 2014-02-07
Packaged: 2014-04-14 00:15:00
Rating: M
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,345
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10077477/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2954453/ChipChallenge149
Summary: Between Quest for Glory 4 and Quest for Glory 5, at the 10-year reunion, the hero (fighter) finds that he hasn't kept good care of Spielburg. Rated R for sexual themes.





	1. Introduction

Sometime between QFG4 and QFG5 at the Famous Adventurer's Correspondence School 10 year reunion, the hero returns! His principal says: "I am glad so many of you could make it to the class of '92's 10 year reunion. As you know, this has been an exciting few years of adventuring. This class's Dudley McRoberts slayed his third dragon just last week. Your own class valedictorian, Bradley Gladstone, just recently defeated the evil wizard Garanzeck." The audience of fellow adventurers bursts into applause. "Of course, these past ten years have not been without its share of flops as well. Who can forget the death of Rodney Openheimer? Forgot to save his game before battle, poor bugger. And then there was Spielburg –" He startled to his senses. Did he just say Spielburg? "The shoddy job of heroing done there left that poor valley worse off than it was before…" The crown mumbles to itself disapprovingly. "What's that? I've just received word that the 'hero' who did that job is with here us today…" The crowd again begins to talk, people start craning their necks to look around. Time to casually head for the exit…so the hero travels back to Spielburg…to finish what he started. Quest For Glory 4½: So he thought he was a hero?

He shall be a fighter, called Quest.


	2. Centaur one-tenth Century wait

After weeks of traveling Quest finds himself back in Spielburg valley. The new Baron approaches him with two guards, saying: "Ah! So the great hero returns! Well, we are no longer in need of your services here. Unlike my father, I can take care of the valley myself. I will expect you to leave the way you came. If I see you around again you will be arrested." With an arrogant huff the Baron turns away and walks back towards the castle. This just doesn't seem to be your week. At least the pass is no longer blocked.

Quest walks three blocks west until he finds the town gates. He saw a new "trinket" stand in front. He went up to the vendor to talk. "My God! Could the legends be true? Are you the hero who so long ago served this valley? It is you! Well, you could not have returned at a better time…Spielburg is in trouble like never before. The Baron's son, Bernard, the new Baron, is a fool. Oh, by the way, my name is Merv, and I sell trinkets…" the vendor told Quest. So Quest asked about Spielburg. "Ah Spielburg. I grew up here, but traveled the world in search of new an interesting trinkets. My mom lives over by the Adventurer's guild. Lovely place, Speilburg. You could probably tell me more about it than I you. It is comprised of the town, the castle, and the valley. Oh, and then, of course, there's Bill's Laundromat Bar and Grill." Quest asked more about the Castle. "The castle's a little ways north of here. That is where the royal family and the town guards live. It used to be a fine place, but since the Baron's son has taken over it does not get a lot of visitors." Quest asked more about Bill's Laundromat Bar and Grill. "Bill's Laundromat Bar and Grill was started by some ex-Brigands after they were closed down. It is where the ol' Brigand compound used to be, in the southern part of the valley. If you go there do watch your step. Those rednecks can get a bit rowdy at times. Quest asked more about town. "Why not go see for yourself? The town is right behind us. Just watch yourself if you go into the Hero's Tale in. It's under new, seedy management." Quest changed the topic to ask about the Baron's Son. "Since the death of the Baron last Spring, his son, Barnard, has been running the valley. I would like to believe he is just arrogant and young, but in truth, I fear there is a deeper evil to him. He has hired an 'Elite Guard' to protect him. Says he never trusted his father's old guards. His sister, Elsa, would have made a much better leader if you ask me…but alas, she has disappeared." Quest asked about the Baron's Daughter. "Poor Elsa…seems she ends up missing every game. She is a year older than her brother, Bernard, so she would have been the rightful head to the throne. However, with her gone, we were left with Bernard. And a fine mess he's made of things." Quest asked about the Elite Guard. "The 'Elite Guard', nicknamed 'the Gestapo' by some less then admiring town people, are Bernard's personal guards. Their uniforms are darker blue then the other guards, and they answer only to Bernard. They're not from around here either. Hired mercenaries, they are. Watch for 'em, they're a dangerous lot." Quest changed the topic to ask about troubles. "Where do I begin? I suppose you should know that the Sheriff has been murdered. Also, Elsa, the Baron's daughter, and Bernard's sister, went missing the day after the Baron's death. I know other people are in pretty bad spots. Go explore for yourself, don't just talk to me." Quest asked about the Sheriff's murder. "His body was found 3 nights ago in his home. Stabbed in the neck, the poor guy. No way for him to go. The Sir Richard, the new town hero, handled the murder. Busted down poor guy's door in the middle of the night. They arrested the Butcher, but I'm not convinced. It doesn't seem likely that ol' Butch Beefmeister would do it. The whole thing smells funny if you ask me." Quest asked about other people's troubles. "I think just about everyone in town has their problems. Go, ask around. I, myself, am fine, thanks." Quest changed the topic to ask about trinkets. "Interested in ol' Merv's wares, are ya? Well, most of the stuff I sell is for children…But I just got a new item in today that I'm sure is fun for all ages. A wind-up meep! You're familiar with the little creatures on the west side of the valley? Well, now you can own your own! Just 10 silver each…how many can I put you down for? Oh, and I also got some industrial strength sleeping pills. Do not take with alcohol." Quest asked about the Meep Toy. "Cute little critters…pop up and down outta holes in the western corner of the valley. These little wind up dolls look just like em. And a bargain at 10 silver!" Quest asked about Sleeping Pills. "Having trouble sleeping these days? I've got the pills that'll knock you out good. Course, I wouldn't advise taking them with alcohol. That'll put you out for days." That was all Quest could talk about. "Good luck, adventurer. And please, stop by and visit ol' Merv anytime." Merv said. So Quest got his money out. "Well, right now all I have is Food Rations, sleeping pills, and meep toys. What can I get you?" Quest bought a Windup Meep Toy. "Excellent choice. Hours of fun for ages 3 and up." Quest bought Sleeping Pills. "Sleeping pills coming right up sir." He paid the gold. "Use wisely. Remember, these are what killed Elvis." Quest bought Food Rations. "Everybody needs food rations!" He paid the gold. Then Quest put his money back. "Thanks for shopping Merv's!" Merv said.

Quest went west into town. He entered the sheriff's office. This office looked familiar to him. "Thank God! Hero, you must help me!" Quest went up to the cell and talked to the butcher. "Thank God you're here! You've gotta help me! I'm innocent! I've been arrested for the murder of the sheriff! Sir Richard and Otto kicked down my door two nights ago. They claimed that I was guilty and threw me in here. They plan on hanging me, I am sure. You've got to help me, you're my only hope." Quest asked about the Sheriff. "I've always been rather fond of the sheriff, actually. I was devastated to learn of his murder. I was even more devastated when I was arrested for it! I couldn't hurt a mouse! However, I can carve up a pretty mean mouse carcass if you are ever in the mood." Quest asked about the Murder. "It happened last a few nights ago. I was working late, preparing a few leg of lambs when I heard the noise. By the time everyone got to the house, it was all over. The sheriff was dead, and the house an awful mess. Then, the very next night, I was arrested for it!" Quest asked about Richard. "He kicked down my door, and claimed that he had proof that I was the murderer. When I asked for the proof, he said that several witnesses had seen me at the crime scene, covered in blood. I am a butcher, for God's sake…when am I not covered in blood? He wouldn't even listen though. Him and Otto dragged me straight here, where I have been since." Quest asked about Otto. I have never had anything against Otto. He's always been a loyal protector of this town. However, since the sheriff's murder, he has been spending a lot of time at the Hero's Tale Inn. I don't much trust that crowd." Quest couldn't help with anything more. "Please return soon! I have a feeling my days are numbered. Lord, get me out of here!" Quest searched the sheriff's desk. He found the top drawer unlocked and opened it. Ah ha! He found the sheriff's journal. The last entry read: "I have cracked the case! I know what happened to Elsa, and tomorrow I will make some arrests. I will not write more until I have the suspects in custody. - Sheriff Meistersson."

Quest left the sheriff's office. He went to the old Kattas Tale Inn. It is now the Reputable Businessman's Club. As he entered the room, everyone immediately stopped what they were doing and looked at him. He immediately noticed three thugs holding crossbows. "Welcome to our legitimate Businessman's Social Club. The name's Al. You are that hero everyone talks about, am I mistaken? Well, I am sure you will feel right at home here. You see, we are all good, law-abiding citizens here too." Quest started to talk to Al. "What can I help you with?" Quest asked about the Club. "We're the only club in town where a legitimate business man can come to unwind. Our saying is, 'We're just a club, and you cannot prove differently.'" Quest asked about the Mafia. "Mafia? What's the mafia?" Quest asked about Otto. "Otto is one of our associates. He used to work for the city. We took him in. One day, he hopes to be made." Quest asked about the Sheriff. "The sheriff had an accident, we heard. Most dreadful. We wish his family the best." Quest asked about Murder. "Moider? What is Moider?" Quest changed his topic to ask about Rooms. "We apologize, but we no longer let rooms here." Quest was done talking with Al. "Thanks for dropping by."

Quest went out of the club. He went over to a cape shop. Walking in, he saw the beggar. "Ahoy there, welcome to Sam's cape emporium. I'm Sam and-oh wait! It's you! You're the hero who helped me out so long ago during my begging days with a few silver…With the money you gave me I made a few wise investments, and thanks to you I am now very wealthy!" Quest asked about capes. "Capes is what I do! I have capes for every occasion: Weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, Goblin hunting, you name it. Some of my more popular capes are the hero's red (which you are sporting), the Confederate cape, the Camouflage cape, the Undead Skull Cape, and the Tie-Dye Cape." Quest asked about the Confederate Cape. "Ah! The confederate line! Quite popular with the rough sort that hang out south of the valley. Produced by the Johnny Rebel line of hero's wear." Quest asked about the Camouflage Cape. "The camouflage cape is very popular among the hunters in this valley." Quest asked about the Skull Cape. "Now this is a fine cape indeed! The cape of the vampire-hunter and other undead slayers. With one of these beauties on, no undead creature can harm you at night. Worthless during the day though." Quest asked about the Tie-Dye Cape. "Tie-dye cape, the cape of the hippie. The manufacturer raves that they are 'Psychedelic.' Whatever the hell that means." Quest changed the topic and asked about the Store. "I own cape stores in a few major cities, including Spielburg, Lucus, Scorsese, Stone and Zemeckis. And it is all thanks to you, and some wise investments I made with the money you gave me. And with all the new adventurers in town, this branch of my stores has become one of the most profitable!" Quest asked about investments. "Well, with the money you gave me, I first invested in some horizon growth mutual funds. That paid pretty well, but with the net I got from that, and to avoid capital gain tax, I reinvested. This time I went into a wire-less IPO. Got in at around 5 ½, and sold at 42 1/3. Sold off a portion of that, went into over-seas oil, and bought a chain of cape stores in a few cities. With the rise of adventurer's in this city, I'm now the richest man in Spielburg."

**Check back to see the chapter as it progresses...**


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